The Two Coreys

dold · Senior Member

RE: The Two Coreys

Wockenfuss · Guru

Corey Haim is truly one of most annoying people in history. Dude hit the pills too hard to successfully film his cameo in Lost Boys 2. Feldman, being the professional, got right back into his old vampire hunting garb and looked awesome.

Speaking of Feldman and awesome, his wife is super naked here. Not to be viewed at work, if your work cares about such things as lopsided boob jobs and pierced genitals.

A little disappointing.

Wockenfuss · Guru

I've got to give the guy a bit of props for just assing out like that on national TV. Not that it was the first time.

Now I need to go buy the new issue of Playboy with his whitey wife in it...

dold · Senior Member

Wow, I don't know what to think. He's either the biggest stallion, or the biggest douche that ever lived. survey says....douche.

EA Sports · Guru

A-dip-doobee-doobee-I love you.

Wockenfuss · Guru

Last week's episode featured possibly one of the greatest moments in the history of television:

Damn that is good.

Wockenfuss · Guru

Anybody else watching this?

I doubt it...

pocaroba · Guru

What?! It's already back on? Oh, I better set my recordings...

Wockenfuss · Guru

There are two new episodes of this waiting for me on my DVR.

I'm scared.

pocaroba · Guru

What the hey? Where is Haim? Where is the other Frog brother? I feel cheated. Are you telling me that they couldn't write those two guys in? This just looks purely bad. Not even cheesy bad like Dream A Little Dream 2. Although maybe Feldman will bring the magic sunglasses.

Although I will watch it, it will be under protest. How dare they leave out the other Frog brother? I can't believe Feldman sold out.

That last part was sarcasm.

Wockenfuss · Guru

Biff, better put in your pre-order for this straight to DVD release.

pocaroba · Guru

Ouch. I never saw the final episodes. They were fighting? This show seemed so fake I couldn't stand it. This time they should go live in the cardboard box that Haim calls home. Now THAT would make for entertaining and exploitive television.

Wockenfuss · Guru

This should be about as good as Dream A Little Dream 2.

Which I understand is not good.

pocaroba · Guru

Weird, I swear I never saw that in the previews. It's always Haim crying and then jumping on the bed. Yeah, the fight was kind of silly. It would have taken those wusses hours to even come close to hurting one another. It also seemed somewhat fake to me.

Wockenfuss · Guru

They showed that fight in almost every preview I saw.

So I don't know what the hell you're talking about.

Either way, even the fight wasn't that interesting.

pocaroba · Guru

Do you know what I found odd? That they didn't show that oddly staged looking fight the Coreys got into (in a late episode) in any of the previews. If I am the add wizard at A&E that would be the 1st clip I would throw in. I was watching an episode last night that I haven't seen completely (the one where Haim is thinking about getting married) and was marvelling at how disinterested I was. The more I watch it the more and more it seems staged and completely acted out. It makes me angry but then I remember that hockey season starts in 2 1/2 weeks and I won't have to watch regular TV again for roughly 8 months. Thank God.

Wockenfuss · Guru

This show should be called the Two Boreys.

Count it.

EA Sports · Guru

Is a "Man Band" like a c0ck ring?

Wockenfuss · Guru

Oh, it's painful, but I keep watching. I think I might have missed last week's episode. I saw the surprise party one and then the one where Haim is trying to decide whether or not to marry his girlfriend. Was there one in between where she showed up? I was without cable for a few days...

Is anyone else watching Mission: Man Band? I'll start a thread if so.

It's pretty good.

pocaroba · Guru

Yeah, I get the vibe that the Coreys' agents must have some say in the final edits of this program. The show really skirts around a lot of the bad stuff about these guys. It is annoying how the show is trying to come off as a real life "Odd Couple." I mean, dude, show them going to AA together or something. Give me something!

And hey, someone has to protect the Coreys. They sure as hell don't.

Wockenfuss · Guru

It's funny how you are protective of the Coreys.

You make a great point, one that I forgot to make, how did they not follow Haim when he was upset and left the house for his "walk?" They are doing a terrible job with this.

I will continue to watch though, I guess.

pocaroba · Guru

Okay, I have seen all of these now (1-4 at least) and feel pretty much the same way as you guys. While I am glad that the show is not going out of its way to embarrass the Coreys, as I thought the ads did, it is almost like the show is going out of their way to not embarrass the Coreys. This show could be so much better. Give them a reason. Have them try to write a movie. Follow them as they film a movie. Something like that. Just having Haim show up for no reason and making them do obvious set up stuff like eat lunch with PETA lady and hang out in a sweat lodge is stupid. Why didn't they follow Haim when "he left for a walk" and showed up HOURS later with a stupid vase. I bet his little trek was far more informative than Mrs. Feldman's stupid photo shoot.

It is too bad because this show could be awesome. It seems to be just stupid.

Wockenfuss · Guru

I just got caught up with the 3rd and 4th episodes tonight.

It's never a good sign for a show when they're knocking out two new episodes every week. Seems like they're just trying to get it over with. And as much as I hate to admit it, the show is not good.

And part of the problem is exactly what Roddi brought up: There is no premise or goal or any reason that any of this is happening. I so wish they were out on a promotional tour, or trying to get funding for a terrible film, or anything like that. Instead, they show Haim getting his hair done and the guys going to the store to buy nicotine gum.

A prime example of why this show blows: They build it up like Haim is going to have to take his driver's test over again. They do this by showing them driving to the DMV, practicing test questions, waiting in line, and when he finally gets up to the front it turns out he doesn't have to re-take the test and they just give him a new license. Dude. If I want to see people filling out forms at the DMV, I've got my own boring life. I don't need to watch these guys do it.

roddi kneff · Veteran Member

i was out of town on vacation for 9 days so i missed the premiere, but the old lady taped them for me, and i've now seen all four episodes. it seems way scripted to me. is the premise that haim is there so they can promote the 20th anniversary of the lost boys? by not addressing the reason haim is living with them makes it seem very "surreal life" to me.

i guess the guys can pull it off a little better because they've been acting since they were kids but susie is not actress and it looks a little forced to me especially with her. but she's the jessica simpson of this reality series and the show needs her.

there careers could both use a good kickstart, and maybe this will help them land of couple of decent movie roles. just imdb them. feldman has worked a little more than haim but the last decade has been pretty rough for them both.

i did enjoy the part where susie caught feldman smoking with haim, and he just had nothing, no good lie because she caught him in the act. and then the coreys just couldn't stop laughing. that was pretty funny. and then he later admitted while he said they'd (susie and him) both quit that in reality he'd been smoking for some time.

this is the only new show of the summer that'd i've watched so i feel pretty good about that.

angie · Veteran Member

yes! BUT we bought my old man tivo for father's day (with a full rebate mind you) for these very emergencies. the only thing that the folks have learned how to record is The Closer. so we have plenty of room on there for haim-ster and feld-dog.

Wockenfuss · Guru

EA - It's on regular A&E. I'm pretty sure.

biff - Sounds like you miss your DVR.

pocaroba · Guru

How did I forget to watch this? I swear, all of the sweet programming that I enjoy is on at 10 on weeknights, which is just a tad to late for me. However, I would gladly lose sleep to watch this show. But isn't Baio on late? And Rock of Love? And Intervention? That's another thing! Why did they move Intervention to Friday night? The last thing I want to do on my feel good Friday night is watch the most depressing show on television. I would much rather laugh at the Coreys. A&E is run by a bunch of morons.

EA Sports · Guru

I don't think I get the channel that it's on. Biography right? I have only the most basic of cables.

Wockenfuss · Guru

Two episode, one hour premiere last night. It did not disappoint.

Items of note:

- I'm not sure why Haim is living with Feldman. They don't really explain it.

- Haim still seems like he's on pills. Or maybe his brain is just busted. It's hard to tell.

- Feldman's wife is an idiot. She's got a pretty tight lil' body on her, but that can only get her so far. She sits next to the Coreys while they do an autograph signing at a Lost Boys screening and writes her name on the Lost Boys poster that is behind them on the wall. Not cool.

- Feldman really has a knack for taking himself too seriously. But he's by far the best part of the show.

- My DVR is set for a series recording and I'm in it for the long haul. Anyone else see it?

pocaroba · Guru

Demolition University is on DVD, own it, in a real budget bin plastic case. Its awesome, it has a picture of Haim on the cover from his heyday. Too bad in the movie he has like shaved eyebrows and looks hopped up on goofball. I have Demolition High on VHS. High is far superior. Although University has the redhead from Head Of The Class if memory serves.

A 2-pack would be awesome. Almost as awesome as a special edition of Snowboard Academy.

Wockenfuss · Guru

Really though, when are they going to release Demolition High and Demolition University in a double DVD value pack?

pocaroba · Guru

Don't tease. You know I would be first in line for that one. They already released special editions of Lost Boys and License To Drive (my personal Corey fave), so a Dream special edition would kick ass. The License To Drive DVD is awesome and I highly reccomend it to anyone who enjoys this much overlooked flick. It's weird how now they are known for Lost Boys even though that isn't really the best of the Corey flicks. Or maybe people think it is. And they are lame.

Wockenfuss · Guru

I'm assuming this show is corresponding with the release of the Dream A Little Dream Criterion Edition DVD.

pocaroba · Guru

Yeah, them on the couch is obviously scripted. I'm sure most of the scenarios are scripted. I mean, c'mon, the head of PETA is going to Corey Feldman's house for dinner on a normal night? Pish posh. However, I do think that Haim being a semi-retarded manchild is sadly unscripted.

Wockenfuss · Guru

Yeah, that's what I linked to.

From Wikipedia: "The show is to focus on fictional versions of Haim and Feldman, with the comedy focusing on Feldman living with his wife and son, and Haim a bachelor re-entering Feldman's life and shaking up his comfortable suburban lifestyle."

So, maybe that explains how nice Feldman's house is, and how scripted the lines are.

I'm still going to watch the hell out of it.

EA Sports · Guru

Wock - for some reason whatever video you linked didn't auto play for me so I went to the main site and watched some 7 minute preview - not sure if that's what you were linking to, but I gotta ask, is this supposed to be a reality show? Cos the way Feldman's wife talks is terribly unreal. Like when they are sitting on that couch doing interviews, it sounds like she's reading from a script. Or have I misread this show entirely?

pocaroba · Guru

Oh, it is just painful. Haim is straight up crazy. I think the drugs have taken a permanent toll on the man. So, is that house actually Feldman's? How the hell is he making enough money to be living there? I can't wait for this show. They're like the original odd couple!

Wockenfuss · Guru

I don't think this show is unscripted. Which could make it better, or worse, depending on how they play it. Haim seems to be working extra hard to be annoying. Could get old real quick.

EA Sports · Guru

Are these guys for real anymore?

Haim seems like such a douche.

Wockenfuss · Guru

Another Good One

pocaroba · Guru

I don't know. He was clean for a little while, supposedly, and he got super bloated (check him in Dickie Roberts). Of the two, his substance abuse problem is way worse. Feldman totally kicked 'em years ago and Haim has never really quit as far as I can tell. Either he has been working out or he is probably on something. Also I'm sure he's just a bi-polar manic depressive type guy. Haim's story is definitely sadder as he was the more successful of the two and has had a way bigger fall from grace.

Wockenfuss · Guru

Is Corey Haim back on drugs? He kind of looks like **** and seems a little too jazzed/easily brought to tears.

Nice take on this, btw. I agree with you. Hopefully the show will be better than the ads.

pocaroba · Guru

You know, here is my thing with this.

I have been a big Corey lover for years now. Anyone who knows me knows that I own nearly every movie that either of these fine gents have made, including such hits as "Stepmonster," "The Double O Kid," and Corey Haim's self made "Corey Haim: Me, Myself And I." Why they are not the best actors in the world I always just found them fascinating for the steady rise to fame and subsequent immediate removal from mainstream Hollywood. I mean "Dream A Little Dream" is 1989 and "Rock And Roll High School Forever" is 1990. In recent years it has become vogue to like the Coreys but only if you are in some way ridiculing them. I am all for ridiculing celebrities. WHEN THEY ARE FAMOUS. These two guys are obviously screwed up guys and no matter how much TV tries to bring them back, they do so in to only make fun of them. Feldman made a complete ass out of himself on The Surreal Life. I saw a preview last night for "The Two Coreys" where the music, announcer and promo lines were all zany and good times and lighthearted and all of that. And then they show the clip that Wock posted of Haim crying. Like that is the zany good time show. Some guy finding out that he was not invited to make a cameo in a crappy sequel to probably the biggest movie he ever made. That isn't funny to me. It is just plain sad. These guys are sad and it is sad to me that they continously put themselves on TV to be mocked under some misguided notion that it will bring them back to the public eye.

Phew!

(I am stoked for the show by the way, I am just bummed in the way that it is being advertised)

Wockenfuss · Guru

Check this:

What Really Happens to Child Stars

Wockenfuss · Guru

Oh this is going to be good.