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Post Info TOPIC: Portland Timbers


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RE: Portland Timbers


So, season's over and we won the suck. Last place.... last frikkin' place.

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Well played.

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I would liken it to really awesome foreplay...

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"gifting Atlanta a 2 man advantage for almost 20 minutes."

That statement right there illustrates why I do not have the temperament for soccer. A 20 minute power play? At the end of the game? If that happened to the Canucks I would surely put my foot through the TV and go on a rage-fueled crime spree. You are a patient, patient man.

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The Juventus match was pretty good. The Timbers squeaked by 1-0. Had a meet-n-greet with the players from both teams after the game at Kell's so that was pretty cool as well. Went over to the Thirsty Lion after that with a few Timbers players.

So after the embarrasing loss last Tuesday in the US Open Cup, the Timbers gutted out a 2-2 draw against Atlanta after having Tommy Poltl red carded in the 17th minute and Scot Thompson red carded (unfairly thanks to play acting by an Atlanta cvnt) in the 71st minute, gifting Atlanta a 2 man advantage for almost 20 minutes. Even then it took Atlanta until the 88th minutes to score the tying goal. That's right, the Timbers took a 2-1 lead with only 10 men. It was a pretty awesome game, the Timbers fought harder than I've seen them fight all year, so I'm hoping that was a turning point for them.

And fortunately they have a 2 week break before they go on a 2 game road trip to Carolina and Atlanta on the 27th and 28th and then have a home exhibition against Monarcas Morelia of the Mexican Primera Division. Hopefully, they'll get rested and work out the little injuries some of them are carrying.

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The Juventus match should be fun. Though with how poorly we've been playing lately, it could be a slaughter, especially as we'll likely be seeing more people that sit on the bench for league matches.

Friday was fun. I ran into you and a girl I went to high school with that I hadn't seen in at least 13 years. Pretty wild.

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EA, looking at coming to the game this Saturday. I'll call you tonight with deets. Thanks again for the funky bass-lines on Friday.

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Well played EA, well played.

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I would absolutely *love* to see you say that to:

1. the 6' 2" 163 lb. pure muscle Didier Drogba -


or 2. Duncan Ferguson


"In 2001, Ferguson was the victim of a burglary attempt by two men at his then home in Rufford, Lancashire. Ferguson confronted the pair and was able to detain one of them who subsequently spent three days in hospital."

or 3. Roy Keane


or any number of hooligans that seem to be making a comeback. Go find your self a Millwall supporter and have that little chat with him and let me know how your medical insurance handles that bill.

I don't know that I've ever heard a 1-1 draw referred to as a high scoring affair, if you can point me in that direction I'd be interested to hear that clip.

Way to troll the board, it was a good effort, but you mostly just sound like an ignoramus. Or American.

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Wow, you're right those are both gayer than soccer. Only slightly though. Soccer players are mainly gay euros who wear tight jeans, pointy loafers, and couldn't tip to save their lives. **** soccer. When a 1-1 game is a high scoring affair, the sport sucks. Also, what's the deal with the over time in soccer? Does that make any sense? What a ****in dumb way to make up the extra time! Soccer is truly a waste of time

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Drainiac


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Check that, the REALLY real gayest sport ever (after 'roidball)...

Gayest Sport Ever, fer sure.

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The real gayest sport ever...



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Drainiac "droppin' in like turds"

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Just because they're not so juiced up that they're berries (or should I say Barry's) have become the size of peas, doesn't mean you have to hate them c-dog.

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Soccer is the gayest "sport" there is. Quoting Van Smack, "I'd rather jump into a SARS-infested pool with my mouth open than watch a soccer game". Truly, a well thought out and refined observation. Soccer sucks, and so do the retards that watch it.

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Drainiac


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Dude, I so wanted to go to that! I saw it was a 0-0 tie, which made me feel a bit better that I didn't miss any crazy goal action. But still my night was a lame filled douche-fest. Keep me in mind next time EA.

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I am tre' jealous. I am currently in the midst of an in-law barbeque. LAME LAME LAME!

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Just remembered I have Brad's number, too. Expect some texts gents.

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Dold, Brad, the Timbers play in Seattle tonight and I will be watching this match via the internets at my house. Interested? I might even call you, Dold, since I have your number.

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I knew that something was special about em when my awesome-meter started itchin. I'll swoop by and see if they still have the rest of them.



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I saw you called but I was at work and couldn't get back to you, especially since you didn't leave me a message (pet peeve).

Too bad I didn't get this sooner, I'd've totally had you grab em for me.

Yeah, the NASL (North American Soccer League) was the first soccer league in the US that got started in '68 but folded in the early 80s. The original Timbers and Sounders originally played in that league. There was also a team called the New York Cosmos that had Pele and Franz Beckenbauer among other aging soccer stars.

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EA I tried to blow you up the other day cos I found some cool (potentially) **** that I thought you may be interested in. I was at the Value Village in the couv and I came across a goat load of soccer pennants, and I'm pretty sure they're old school. There was like 30 of em, I bought about half of what they had, but I'm going to be in the couv again tonight, let me know if you want me to grab the rest. Most of them were $2.00 a piece. They is totally a Timbers one in there, as well as Seattle, and a heap of other teams. I think they were in a league called NASL, I don't know, is that right? Anyhoo, they look pretty rad, let me know.



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Things are coming up EA!

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Jim announced his retirement in January and the season opener (Chris Brown scored the only goal in our 1-0 win) was his final performance as Timber Jim. For the 2 games we had this week there was a temporary sort of guy who filled in sawing slabs off of the log when goals were scored. They aren't looking for a full on replacement for him yet and will be having a few guests throughout the season to try them out before they decide on a permanent replacement.

So on Thursday we beat the Minnesota Thunder 2-1. Chris Brown scored again and Shaun Higgins tallied the second goal. It was a pretty good game though a little closer than I usually expect from the Thunder. Historically they are one of the worst teams in the league.

Saturday, man what a day! Derby match against hated rivals the ****tle Flounders (Seattle Sounders) and we beat those rat bastards 2-0. Such a good day. One of our new forwards, Takayuki Suzuki scored on an amazing shot from 20 yards out in the 6th minute. It stayed that way until the 76th minute when one of our new midfielders, Miguel Guante, put our second past Flounders keeper Chris Eyelander. The biggest surprise of the night was that there were actually some Seattle fans that showed up for the game. When the Timbers play in Seattle we'll usually gewt some where between 30 and 50 people up for the game, though last year at the game for Cinco de Mayo up there, there were 200 odd people that went up on a couple of buses. So, basically what I'm sayin' is that we usually get quite a few people for away games in Seattle, but usually they never come down for these games. The most I'd seen before last night's game was 15 tops. So it made it that much sweeter to hand Seattle their asses in front of their traveling fans.

The Timbers in 3 matches have secured the maximum 9 points available from the 3 wins and have a +4 goal differential and are "top of the league and takin' a piss."

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What was happening with Timber Jim? Did they find a new mascot or something? I am very curious.

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Well the Timbers won on Thursday. Nice little send off for Timber Jim. It was a testy little match. Puerto Rico had a player sent off and there were a couple of scuffles involving whole teams and benches. Nothing like a hockey fight though. One of our new forwards, Chris Brown, scored in the 71st minute and should have had a second a little while later but couldn't manage to put it away on either of his shots. Because of all the Timber Jim stuff I couldn't enjoy the game as much as I might have otherwise. I had to run back and forth from the north end to the control room pre-game and at half time to make sure all the special TJ stuff went off without a hitch so I never really got to settle down.

On the upside everything went well so I think I'm in the clear as far as not having to work future matches.

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As I mentioned in the baseball thread, let me know good and in advance if you want me to get some tix for you for the Timbers home opener, aka Timber Jim's final night as mascot.

Flags and banners, that's how we roll.

Did anyone else notice in the video, right as the ball is going into the net that someone shouts something that sounds like, "Punch him in the butt!"?



Hot dogs

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I think that I should purchase an Oregon flag and bring it with me wherever I go. At the grocery store, to a movie, at the park, a wedding, wherever. Whenever something cool happens then I can waive my flag.

Looks like mad cap soccer hooligan fun.

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I like the looks of that! If there's one thing that I like it's flags!

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Portland Timbers are back!!!


Timbers are back!!!!! Played their first pre-season friendly last night against the San Jose Earthquakes of MLS (they were in the league two years ago but folded and some new owner has resurrected the team). We lost 2-1 but we were playing their A-team so all in all it wasn't a bad showing (other than the first 15 minutes).

There's another pre-season game on Sunday at 2 at Pacific University's Lincoln Park (har har) if you're interested Dold. $5 - cheap!

Our goal scored by our new defender Tim Karalexis. It's not as raucous as at the park since there were *only* 300 of us (300 hundred at a pre-season at a college? Amazing!) The timbers are wearing their new for this season alternate kit, "Rose City Red."

[youtube=http://youtube.com/watch?v=8uIXPY1HcdI]

-- Edited by EA Sports at 21:41, 2008-03-29

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RE: Portland Timbers


That is a pretty top-notch gift. That shirt was created for you EA.

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Holy **** that thing is amazing! They should totally go back to that!

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So my drummer comes over last night to get a beer with me and says he has a present for me. He shows up with this:

DSC00080.jpg

DSC00081.jpg

Vintage late 70s/early 80s Timbers shirt with that great 80's mesh style for the sleeves. This thing is fcuking sweet!

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Nothing hilarious about it. When those slabs of log get cut off you can feel your balls drop about a foot!

Pretty big bummer. The Timbers better score about 8 goals that night for old time's sake.

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What! I'm mean I'm bummed for the Timbers, but what the hell are The Hawks going to do for mascot night?!
I've got the calender marked, I can' wait to see him saw a piece of the log off! That's sounds hilarious!

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Fcuk me! Timber Jim is retiring...

Timber Jim retires

Dold, you gots to make the home opener, April 17th.

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This season is looking great. On top of the highly improved schedule over past years, we're finally getting new turf down there. It's called Field Turf and it's what all the pro american football teams play on and FIFA (soccer's governing body) endorses it as a reasonable substitute for actual grass. I'm actually a little worried about how high my expectations are...

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EA, I agree that scheduling can heavily affect the season. Puerto Rico? That is brutal. The Nucks have a crazy amount of games on Sundays this season and it is driving me nuts. Who wants to play a bunch of early games on Sundays? Not the Nucks, that's who. God, I wish I could go 'Hawk it up with you boys. There is nothing better than seeing a Seattle/Portland game. You are almost guaranteed blood on the ice.

I think all mascots should have chainsaws.

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I do indeed work down there. Hooked up Wock and co. with some tix for a Beavers game last year.

Timber Jim rules. Possibly the best mascot ever. The dude's an actual lumberjack so he'd probably work well for that stupid indoor lacrosse team too, but they can't have him. The Timbers Army gets together on first thursdays during the off season and Jim usually comes down and hangs out/chats etc with everyone, takes a bunch of pictures and then posts them on the Timbers Army message board. TJ is a legend!

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What!? Free tickets....what the crap....legend! How can you manage that? Do you work for them or something? You know it's funny, cos I was just on the site, and their mascot is a stallion! He always comes to mascote night that the Hawks have once a year, and he always brings his chainsaw....the people totally eat it up! I'm looking forward to seeing that guy.


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You'll be begging for a scarf by the end of the game! :)

Two more months. Good stuff. That should easily be do-able.

Plus I can hook you up with free tickets.

-- Edited by EA Sports at 07:06, 2008-01-15

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Man, I'd be all over it! The Hawks play for another two months or so, the regular season lasts until the end of March, then playoffs. What's even more rad is that you can get super cheap tickets for the Hawks, $5 gets you dyno seats. You should totally come to a game!
I'd love to come to a timbers game, but I can't guarantee that I'll be sporting one of those scarves.



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So, it's probably still a little premature to be starting this thread but since the schedule came out today, I'm on a bit of a high and just about couldn't help posting about it.

Our schedule looks gooooood this year. Whereas in years past our team had had to travel to the east coast and play 3 games in 4 days a couple of times (against three different teams in three different east coast cities no less), this year there isn't any of that. We've got 4 home games to start the year. None of the road trips are more than 2 games in length and we only have to travel to Miami and Puerto Rico once each.

Additionally, 9 of our homes games are on Thursdays! That equals cheap beer for all involved, or rather in my case, means that I will actually be able/willing to buy beer at the park.

Our schedule looks good, the players that are definitely coming back/joining the team look good = this could be an amazing season.

Dold, how much longer does the Winterhawks season last? I'll come to one of those if you come to a Timbers game!

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